IWSG post

My first post after who knows how long with the IWSG! Glad to be back.

What am I insecure about? Where do I start. . .

I think I struggle most with why am I wasting my time. I could say that regardless of if I ever get published, or let's be honest, even land an agent, I write just for me. But the truth is, I do want to be successful as a writer. I had no idea when I started a few years ago that it would be so difficult.

My husband is supportive, but I have children, a job, a home to maintain. How do I justify spending hours writing, reading, or critiquing when there is no guaranteed payoff. I really don't want fame, or even fortune (although I wouldn't mind a little money). I guess I just want validation. The right to say I'm a writer.

I've sent off a few short stories. Rejection. I've entered a few writing contests in the blogosphere. Not even an honorable mention. I've had a few writers critique my work. Nicely worded but god-awful. I've tried giving up, but here I am again because I have a story I have to tell.

Don't worry. I'm not depressed. I have an amazing life in every other aspect, but I just want to write too! I see others get agents, get published, win awards, and while I'm happy for them- I wish it could be me.

Sigh.

Well, I'm off to visit some others. Have a great month! See you then :)

Monday post

Drifting in and out of the writing world as I do, everyone else seems to be incredibly productive. And then there's me. I make all kinds of goals, and then I follow that up with all kinds of excuses. Part of the problem is I'm addicted to time wasters like surfing the internet or watching mindless TV. I sit down to rest and instead of having quiet time, I turn on the TV or grab my computer and before I know it, the evening is gone. ARGH! Why do I do that?

My latest writing goal was to write a page a day. That was a couple of weeks ago and I have 3 pages.

How does anyone stay focused?

Then it's also summer break and the kids are home. Is it wrong to count the days for them to go back to school? I love them and all- just maybe not 24/7!!
(As I'm writing this my 7 year old is sharing a cat book with me- on my bed, in my room, at 9:57 p.m.)

Me, "I think it's time for you to go to bed."

Her, "Never!"

That's what's happening here in the sunshine state- how 'bout you?

I'm back!

I tried to stay away, but I couldn't. The story I had to tell has been churning inside and yes! at long last I'm back to writing.

This last year has been a lot of changes, but I've settled into my new home and new state, and I'm ready to move forward. But really, I'm also eager to get back out there and find out what all of you are doing now. Please stop in and catch me up!

Brief summary of where I am- I've just started hitting the keyboard to put down the story that's been evolving in my head. I've pretty much ditched the entire first novel I wrote, but I kept the essence of the characters because I liked them. I moved away from my writers' group in South Carolina but after the summer I will try to find a local chapter. I'm looking forward to that because I'm near a big city again and there seems to be a lot of support.

I'm looking forward to getting back into the online writers community because even though it was at times painful, I learned so much from you!

Looking forward to reading your blogs again!

Rose

Just Breathe

Just breathe.

That's something I need to remind myself to do once in awhile. I've been staying away from my blog because this year has been a bit overwhelming. Between a huge move, health issues, and a few big trips, I've had a lot going on.

Part of the problem is myself. I would describe myself as a chicken little, "the world's falling" kind. Add to the anxiety issues a type A perfectionist and yup! that's me. I don't know how to inspire myself to keep writing when it is seemingly impossible to break out into the book world. I don't even want huge success. I just want some acknowledgement, but I don't do well with failure and rejection. Yet that is part of the process.

At the end of the day- I still want to write. Maybe just for me, but I will write.

As a reader, I've been taking apart the books I read as a writer. I don't do it with books that make me forget I'm reading, the really good ones. But I find those good ones so few and far between. The current one I'm reading feels like the writer was watching a Tom Cruise Mission Impossible movie. I'm bored. I don't want to read it anymore but I kinda want to know how it ends, so I'm trudging through it.

The writer tells instead of shows, and repeats things often, making me feel like he thinks his readers are dumb. And he's a best-selling author.

I don't mind a good action story, or movie for that matter, but you have to make it plausible. I'm one of those who misses the pre-special effects era when you actually had to have a plot. Same with books.

Finally, I know I didn't write much about my trip to Ecuador to visit my in-laws, but we did go, and the trip was wonderful. We had a really good time and no one got the stomach bug, which made it even better! I'd like to go back every year but we are currently broke and I'm looking for a job, so I don't think it will happen this year.

Whew! That was a lot. Thanks for hanging in there!

Wow! It's October already!

I just realized my last post was back in March. How time flies!

A lot has happened since then for me and my family. We've moved and are now settled in our new home near the beach on the east coast. It's a beautiful, historic area with endless things to do, both indoors and out. After I established myself at the local library, I found a pamphlet on the area's writer memberships and conferences. They were holding a free flash fiction workshop at the library and were holding a weekend conference literally 5 minutes from my house! I'm excited to be in an area that is supportive of the arts at last!

Now if only I were writing :(

That will come with time. . .meanwhile I dabbled with painting a little. Just for myself and my family's enjoyment. Which explains the mermaid painting for my daughter, who is currently obsessed with mermaids. Next up will be a horse. (Also an obsession)

Another event to report is that I returned to Ecuador with my family this summer. It was my first trip back in 8 years and it was wonderful. Now I'm determined to retire there early when my youngest finishes school. I have a long time to go but I can dream in the meantime :)

I'm really looking forward to hearing from all of you in my long lost cyber writing world, and of hearing of your latest adventures too. I'll be making my rounds. .

I'm okay!

Sorry about dropping off the face of the blogger world, but I'll probably won't be around much for awhile. A couple of weeks ago my husband discovered that we are going into a deja vu of 6 years ago, meaning we have to move or he's out of job. I feel like a mama bird without a nest, knowing I have to leave, but not knowing where I will make a new home for my little fledglings. I could go on a little rant about the corporate world here- because we find out through the news what is going to happen to the company and how our lives are going to be turned upside down. How they are so concerned about the bottom line that they will toss out hardworking employees in a small city with no prospects and tell them it will be okay. But we are the lucky ones- the other 1000 people don't have the option to move. So I must pack up my family, leave my job, rip my kids away from friends and family (grandparents who followed us on the first move), and start over again in a strange city. What can we do but be grateful this is the worst thing we have to complain about. So thanks to Elise and Linda, who sent out messages to keep in touch, I am still thinking of you too. Maybe when the dust settles I will pick up this blog again, and write too, but 'til then. . .wishing all of you well. Honey/Rose

Books made into Movies

For some reason I can't remember, I had an urge to read a romance by the famous Nicholas Sparks. I've never read one of his books before, and I don't usually like romance, but I figured all those people must like him for something. I bought the nook version of the Lucky One and couldn't put it down, finishing it in three days. Not only was the romance slow and believable, but there was another side to the story that made it almost a thriller/action genre too. It kind of is where I'm aspiring to get my novel to.

Anyway, on the third day of reading the book and finishing it, I rushed out to rent the movie. What a disappointment! It was sooo different from the book it was barely recognizable, and while Zach Effron played the character acceptably, I couldn't stand the female lead. She was high strung and unlikable. Anyway, I finished up the movie feeling like I had wasted 1-2 hours of my time, and I hate wasting time.

As for the other movies based on his books, I'm sorry, I never liked the Notebook and Dear John left me scratching my head. (You don't need to marry someone to help them out while they're sick)

Here's the question- How do you feel about books that are made into movies? Personally, I prefer to read the book first- how about you? Any movies that completely ruined the book, or vice versa. . . made it even better? On that last question, I'm a big fan of two Jane Austen based movies, Emma and Sense and Sensibility.

Finally, I know I fell off the radar over the last few weeks, but I'm feeling great now and slowly getting back into my routine. I'll see you in the rounds and on Wednesday for the ISWG!