Thursday, August 16, 2012

Fairytale Blogfest


Here is my 300 word flash fiction entry. I've chosen plot twist.



      Cinderella stood for moment contemplating in the garden. Her fairy godmother hovered before her ready to grant her wishes, but faced with the opportunity, Cinderella saw a bigger picture emerging.
     “Wait a minute, fairy godmother,” she said with resolution. “I know I wanted to go to the ball, but what I truly want, more than anything, is to have back what was rightfully mine.”
      The fairy godmother held her wand in mid-air, ready to transform Cinderella's rags into a sparkling ballgown, but her smile faded into a look of confusion. “But the prince, my dear, don't you want to meet him?”
      “Here's the thing,” Cinderella went on to explain, “I don't really believe in love at first sight, and my stepmother and sisters are ruining my father's legacy. Because of their greed, they have run his estate into the ground. The peasants who used to live comfortably under my father are now starving. I want my land back.”
      The fairy godmother looked at Cinderella with a look of admiration. “Wish granted,” she said, and with a wave of her wand, she disappeared in a cloud of glitter.
      The following day Cinderella went about her daily work, wondering how her wish would be fulfilled, when a knock at the door grabbed her attention. She wiped her cracked, calloused hands on her apron and opened the heavy wooden door.
      A government official stood at the door with a paper. “I am looking for Ella Dubois, the mistress of this manor.”
      “Mistress? How so?” Cinderella asked.
      “Yes, it appears that the marriage of deceased Monsieur Dubois and a certain Mademoiselle Marie Leroy was fraudulent, and has been officially annulled. That leaves Ella, the only child, as the rightful heir to the estate.”
     Cinderella straightened her shoulders and stood tall. "I am Ella Dubois."


That's it! 300 words exactly. Thanks to Morgan Shamy and friends for their awesome idea. Link here for more information.

30 comments:

  1. Okay, this is the best Cinderella twist EVER! This is exactly what she should have wished for from Fairy Godmother. Great story. :D

    Thanks for visiting my blog and commenting. Glad you alerted me to your flash fic, too.

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    1. Thanks! I needed that positive comment.

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  2. Fun! Rose, you do really well with writing in this time period! I really loved this! <3

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    1. Thank you! All the positive feedback was what I needed to pull myself up again and get back to writing.

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  3. I like how Cinderella doesn't believe in love at first sight-- that's a good twist on the typical fairytale norm that people fall madly in love at only a glance.

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    1. Exactly- those love at first sight stories make me nauseated.

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  4. That's a great twist and a smart woman! She definitely has her priorities straight ;)

    Samantha
    Writing Through College

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    1. Better role model than the Disney version. I want my girls to fight for what's right than get saved by a man for sure!

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  5. I like this. So much story in so few words. I can totally see Ella's strength. Good job. :)

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  6. Love it! I love that she cared more for the people and estate than a ball. That's a much better version than attracting a man to save you.

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    1. I am all about girl power, which is why my favorite movie is Mulan!

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  7. I think that's a noble way to end it.

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  8. Great plot twist. Loved it. I did Cinderella as a plot twist too, right down to the calloused hands, lol!

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  9. Now that sounds like a girl with her head screwed on right. I love that she wanted to set things right for her father.

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    1. Thanks! The original was rather unsatisfactory, which is why I think a lot of us rewrote it.

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  10. Hi, Rose,

    I hopped over from the blogfest. I really enjoyed your retelling of Cinderella. A very unique pov. Well done. I always wondered why Cindy didn't demand her inheritance back once she became of age.

    The annulment was a perfect solution. WELL DONE.

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    1. The inheritance thing always bothered me too. Thanks for stopping in and joining my blog.

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  11. Good for Ella! Girl power. LOL! I like your different take on the theme.

    BTW was the Fairy Godmother really hoovering? ;O)

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    1. Thanks! I guess that was my attempt at a little humour :)

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  12. Aloha Rose,

    Ha! Well done to get Cinders her dues without having to ruin a good pair of glass slippers :)

    Loved it and am now following to see what's next :)

    Thanks for participating :)

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    1. Glad you liked it! Thanks for joining my blog.

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  13. Oh I love independent Cinderella! I always wondered if the fairy godmother didn't know what she was doing, since she watched the girl suffer for so long, but the second a ball comes around, Hey! Here's a new dress! Lol.

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    1. It's one thing to read the story as a kid and quite another as an adult. So much less satisfactory as a grownup!

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  14. Yes! Score one for Cinderella!!!

    Great entry!

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